I Wish I Was Ern Malley

So it turns out I wasn't the only one that thought "iSnack 2.0" wasn't a good name for the new Vegemite. So many people thought it sucked that Kraft has now changed its mind . “We have been overwhelmed by the passion for Vegemite and the new product. The new name has simply not resonated with Australians. Particularly the modern technical aspects associated with,’’ said Kraft spokesman Simon Talbot, according to The Sydney Morning Herald . You don't say. Anyway it's back to the ol' drawing board to come up with a new name. A lady at work suggested "Cheesymite" — maybe spelled "Cheesemite" but pronounced the same way — which I thought was pretty good.

At first I thought it was a joke, but no, Kraft really has decided to name the new kind of Vegemite "iSnack 2.0" . Which is encouraging news in the war on drugs. Clearly the quality and quantity of cocaine available to advertising and media types is in decline. The downside is we get lame product names like "iSnack 2.0". Lame lame lame lame lame. It's hard to know whether this is some post-modern meta way of generating publicity (in which case it's bad news from the war on drugs) , or just a really, really bad idea. There are so many things wrong with the name it's hard to know where to start, but let me try with just a few. There's no "1.0" After 13 years if iStuff, Apple is about the only company that can get away with calling a product iAnything iAnything and "2.0" are both technological terms, about the only thing technological about Vegemite is the jar lid Still, I suppose it's better than Parwill , and look how